yes, i admit to a subtle feeling of imprisonment. i try to dash those thoughts that would describe my reality as such. it's not such a big deal, really. my mind has made it important, this show ted's playing tonight at zoey's cafe. that's where we met eight years ago, talking about architecture and cultural design for the city of ventura, the Avenue. anyway, we met that night at zoey's and the story from his sister is that he came home that night and told her he just met his wife. it would be a year before we would be together and another four years before we would marry after breaking each other's hearts.

so these two beautiful children, whose needs are forever number one. no babysitter or available family, so i'll be home with the kids and my mind built up this Night of Nostalgia at zoey's cafe, a rekindling of that original spark, the Big Boom of our life together. no big deal, just all the closest friends and family on a cozy november night gathering for music at the site of our true love's beginnings!!

perhaps this is my night of remembering, typing to cyberaudience in my reverie. we met at the turn of the century in a european courtyard called 'El Jardin.' ted was so mysterious in his own right. he didn't let on that he was falling in love (of course he shouldn't, what with my boyfriend of three years). until one day we were in the couch-sized kitchen of zoey's at the beginning of a shift i was working with ted, training him as it were. he announced to me that he needed to clear the air, that he didn't want it to feel weird when we worked together. i had been experiencing a few heart attacks every time we worked together from the crazy magnetism between us, but i wasn't going to let on (what with my boyfriend of three years) so i feigned indifference to the anticipation of what he would say. he wore a blue plaid cowboy shirt, his hair was damp and curly, his eyes were solid and blue, and he said "you're really pretty, and i know you have a boyfriend and all, but your presence, just affects me. so i guess i just needed to say that" he wasn't coming on to me but from that moment i was his.

zoey's is a magical place with long tendrils of trumpet vine covering aged brick buildings, art in every corner, music, tea...it was a mythical place to fall in love and tonight my stomach flutters with the remembrance.